8 Month Mental Health Checkup

I’ve been up and out of my bed since 8:25am this morning. Already, I can tell I’m going to need a nap before this day ends. I had a 10am appointment with my therapist at the VA Hospital. I missed my last appointment because I was stupid enough to schedule it at 9am. But, 10am I can do. Barely. I logged off the computer at about 1:20am last night and cheated a little by taking the iPad to bed with me. I set the alarm for 8am. But, I woke up at 6:30am. Somehow, I managed to go back to sleep. Damn. I’m already yawning. And it’s not even noon. I’ve ridden my bike across town to the VA hospital before. But, it’s a long ride. And I wasn’t sure if I would be up to it early in the morning. So, I looked up the bus schedule before I fell asleep. I would wake up at 8am. Catch the bus at 8:53. And get to the VA by 9:40ish.*Snooze* 
*Snooze* 
*Snooze* 
*Snooze* 
*Snooze* 
 Thankfully, I’m not full time yet. So, getting up means bathroom, throwing on the clothes I laid out the night before, brushing my hair and teeth (with different brushes hopefully), gathering up my stuff and head out the door. My roommate wasn’t even up yet when I left. 
 The bus ride took forever. Seemed like we stopped at every stop imaginable as we meandered around the metro area like a slow moving ship. Along the way, I read the morning news on my iPad. I was saddened to find out one of my favorite bloggers and one of the women I really look up too has been diagnosed with breast cancer and my foggy brain misinterpreted a twitter post from a friend. I thought I would be a few minutes late. But, as it turned out, I was about 5 minutes early when I locked up the bike outside. 
 It was nice seeing my therapist again. The last time I had seen her was the anniversary of my birth in April. As we spoke, she often nodded and said “That’s right”, remembering the details of my life. There was a lot of catching up to do. She was shocked that my sister wasn’t even at Thanksgiving dinner. She was pleasantly surprised that I had finally walked into the Center and found so much support there. She was more shocked that I had come out to friends and family and everyone else on Facebook. I told her about my mission to meet one new person at each Ignite Boulder. We made sure I had enough Zoloft to get me through until the next appointment. We briefly talked about getting hormones at the VA. And when I told her about my fears of getting beat up or killed, she gave me some information about resources at the VA for dealing with PTSD. My former private practice counselor had suggested I try E.M.D.R. But, back then, I was in a different place. Now, I think I’m ready to tackle my past. But, it turns out that the VA has three different ways of treating PTSD. They do E.M.D.R. But, they also do P.E. (Prolonged Exposure) and C.P.T. (Cognitive Processing Therapy). We concluded with my decision to do some research before our next appointment to see what I’m more comfortable with. With the holidays approaching, I won’t be able to see her again until the second week of January. When the lady downstairs told me there was a spot open in her schedule at 2pm, I jumped at it.
 
I’m so not a morning person. 
 
I’m currently catching up on some work at a sandwich shop near the hospital. I brought the bike along with me, mostly out of habit. I’m actually not sure if I’m going to ride home or take the bus. I have to be at work tonight at 5pm. So, the bus sounds awfully tempting.

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About Frogtosser

A former sailor and pizza maker who is done hiding from the world and is now living life to it's fullest extent. I'm a single speed bicycle commuter who enjoys writing and photography. I'm a voracious reader. And a huge geek!
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